Leisure Suit.

I am translucent with happiness, for tomorrow I begin three glorious weeks of holidays. Best of all, the first two are to be spent playing host to the lovely Miss Soapagator: puppy-licker, ham inspector and trusted confidante of Senor Hernandez. The lady will be emerging from the jungle and peeling off her pith helmet sometime later this evening. Excellent.

Meanwhile, if anyone knows of any thrilling outings to be had in Melbourne, I'm open to ideas and/or invitations to parties, gigs, galleries, covens, mob violence or car-pooling. Drop me a line or leave a comment below suggesting an activity, preferably one involving giant squid.

Thank you. Let's rendezvous at the helipad at sixteen hundred.